The discussion had started when my granddaughter decided bed wasn’t in her vocabulary for the night. She wanted to watch Mickey Mouse Club House instead. I calmly talked her toward bedtime. She screamed her demands. Life got precarious for a few moments, wills clashed and the rules went out the window as I attempted to maintain a calm I didn’t feel.
I wanted to cry too.
As a Grandma, my job is to love, not discipline. Or is it?
As a Mother, I have to teach love, discipline and maintain the composure of a loving Mother at all times. Even when I’m too tired to love or care, that’s my job.
In the early days, I learned that I can’t love too much. Sometimes, I learned that I can’t love enough… and then there were days when loving meant having a sharp hand and a strong sense of direction, as not all loving means a gentle voice.
When young parents watch my actions, they learn what is appropriate and what is acceptable when leading children. They begin to understand that punishment isn’t always the best way to discipline, and punishment never comes from anger. Young parents need guidance and love, discipline and understanding in order to lead their own children.
Where can that come from, if not grandparents who lovingly guide them?
In the act of moving a mountain, you don’t start with the whole mountain, you simply move one rock at a time, until the entire mountain has been moved.
When loving children, or training up a child, you begin with one small step at a time. Just simply loving the child, maintaining your own level of calm reassurance will bring positive results to the child. Spanking is never the first option and rarely the solution.
A calm voice, a loving tone, and tender, gentle hands will bring obedience faster.